ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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