im gay
i know
yea but for you.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
