Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
