But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Randomize
