After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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