She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
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