Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
That accounts for only three of the penises
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
