So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
