Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
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