ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
3 2 1 whiskey
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
