ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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