She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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