our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
