Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
