I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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