There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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