You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
