Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize
