Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
