Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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