I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
i think my mom watched the whole time
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
