high people should be assigned attendants
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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