i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Randomize
