Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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