Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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