I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Randomize