Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
i already hear my dad disowning me
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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