she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize