Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
