so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
If I die, sorry about rent.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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