God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Randomize