I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
