Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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