everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Vodka?
Forever.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
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