the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
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