i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
