Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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