Already got asked if we're dating
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Randomize
