this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
