so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
he thought i was a dude.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
