we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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