Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize