Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
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Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize