This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
