Tell her she can't have a vagina
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize