super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize