Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Randomize
