physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Randomize
