East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
Buhtt sex?
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
