Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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