Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
